
Long story short, this game sucks!!!! Shame on you, Bandai Namco!
- It takes forever to load. The loading takes longer than the battle itself, and I'm talking normal battles, not boss battles. (Man oh man, do I feel like a major geek right about now).
- The battle system is retarded. Seriously.
- The overworld map is confusing. (Okay, maybe this says more about me, than the game itself...).
- There are like zero anime cutscenes in Tales of the Abyss, not including the intro. (The main reason I bought the freakin thing was I got suckered in by the the intro. I blame YOU, gamespot people.
- The cooking part? Doesn't even count. Star Ocean 2? Suikoden II? Now those had cooking segments. (If you're not into RPGs, why oh why have you even read this far?).
- Finally, the story itself is quite boring. Young boy gets forced into saving the world. I aint complainin' about the "saving the world" part. When done correctly, that's actually a pretty successful formula that's proven itself, time and time again. The problem is with this specific story. Phonic Arts? Scorers? WTF? I've gone through alot ,and I mean alot of rpgs, a zillion times more complex than this one, but they've never left me quite as confused.
One fine day, I handed Raju 20 KD and told him to go to Rihab. He usually goes to Gamecenter and gives me a call once he gets there. Then he hands the phone to someone (Sha3ban was it?... or 3abdilbaa9i6) and we talk shop. So, imagine my surprise when I get a call from someone new. I play it cool, cuz I'm the queen of cool (not really but anyways).
"Salam"
"Salam"
"Shlonkum?" (I use shlonkum to keep it neutral)
"Himdillah"
"Sha3ban mowjood"
"Sha3ban saafar"
(Crap! Crap! Crap!)
"Inzen. Fee "Dawn of Mana"?
"Mafee"
"Fee "Shining Force"?
"Mafee"
"Shino fee RPG jadeed"? (I know. I know. It's "condescending" to speak broken arabic. Spare me.)
"Final Fantasy."
(imma kill him!")
"Hatha qadeem. Mo jadeed... o 3indiyah." (I add on as an afterthought... as if he really cares what I've got and haven't got)
"Mafee."
(ok, this isn't going anywhere)
"Inta yigdar wadee ana sayig hag tanee mahal fee rpg jadeed?" (yes, please lead a customer to the competition... I know, I'm pushing it.)
" HARO, DANA!"
"Raju! Cham marah agoolik, latgool ismy hnaak."
"Shino moshkil?"
('imma keel you!)
"Raju. Abeek itroo7 itdawir thanee ma7al mal playstation. Goolah, inta fee RPG?"
"Jayn. Jayn. Inta sawee telephone baad dageega, ana mafee cardu."
"Baba tawa ma36eek floos it7i6 kart."
"Inta fee cardu 10 dinar, ana fee cardu 5 dinar."
(I can't believe he's arguing with me right now)
"zen asaweelik telephone ba3ad digeega."
(I honestly have no leverage, whatsoever. Sad, really.)
I call him up.
"Salam"
"Salam"
"Fee rpg?"
"Sino?"
"R-P-G. Laaba maal playstation 2"
"Hada maktabah"
(Goddamn you, Raju! He knows perfectly well that this is NOT a store that sells console games.)
"Inzen, mashkoor."
"HARO! DANA"
"Raju, latgool-..." (why bother?) "Raju. Abeek itroo7 ma7al yibee3 RPG."
"Laaba mal playstation?"
"ee"
"jayn"
I call him.
"Salam"
"w'3alaykum ill salam" (Kuwaity this time, and a kid at that, or at least sounds like. He's probably in another wrong store.)
"Low sama7t, abee RPG?
"Ay RPG?"
"Ay RPG yideedah"
"Mithil Shino?"
"Dawn of Mana"
"Layl7een manzalat."
"Imbalah"
"Malat Square-Enix 3adil?"
(ooh I'm impressed! Seriously)
"ee"
"Tanzil 22, 5"
(You know what?... I think the kid might actually be right... my bad)
"Inzen fee Shining Force?"
"Hathee qadeemah. Giltay tabeen yideedah"
(smart-ass)
"Mowjooda?"
"La '7aal9a. Tabeen a6libha 7agich?"
(Once I get my rpg fix, I want nothing more to do with you!")
"La..... Shukran. Fee Artonelico?"
"Kanat mowjoodah, special edition bas '7ali9at. Tabeen a6libha?"
"madry... ee! ok! Inzen, fee Rogue Galaxy?"
" tawha '7aal9a"
"Tales of the abyss?"
"Ee, mowjooda."
"momkin ta36eeh 7ag ill sayig? ill li3ba ib 18 9a7?"
"20"
"i7na zabayinkum min zimaan"
(I'm totally taking advantage of this kid... I feel quite proud of myself)
"Awal marah achoofa sayigkum hnee."
(Drat. The little brat is on to me.")
"Inzen- (I'm about to concede defeat. I don't really care either way. Just practicing my "haggling skills" cuz I could never do that in real life. Oh my God! What am I talking about? This is real life haha Well off the phone, I mean.)
"Yalla mo moshkilla 18", he cuts in.
"ya36eek ill 3afya o'7oy."
(Wtf? Screw my "haggling skills". I need to brush up on my arabic skills. Ya36eek ill 3afya o'7oy? What am I? A guy?)
...and that, my friends, is how I've come to be stuck with this sad excuse of an rpg. That said, I'm only 5 hours into it :D